Best Engineering Jokes to Brighten up Your life

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Engineering Jokes

A funny list of the best engineering jokes, puns, and humour is specially ranked by people who know the distinction between mechanical engineers, electrical engineers, and everybody in the middle. If it’s a funny, quick-witted joke about engineering, you’ll get it here.

Funny and Quick-Witted Best Engineering Jokes

We’ve assembled a list of the funniest and the quick-witted jokes about engineers from over the web.

1. A Group of Hunters

An engineer, an analyst, and a physicist are out hunting. They spot a buck, and each take turns and sack it.

The physicist goes first as per rule. He hauls out his lab book and rapidly figures the direction of the bullet, assuming it is a perfect sphere in a vacuum. The bullet falls 20m short of the deer.

The engineer happily goes second. He hauls out his engineer’s pad and book of bullet presumptions. After a couple of minutes he’s prepared, he aims at, and he fires. The bullet travels 20m passed the deer.

2. Engineer’s Dream Salary

After conducting a job interview, the Human Resources Manager politely inquired the quite young engineer fresh out of university, “And what starting salary would you say you were searching for?”

The engineer stated, “Approximately $100,000 every year, contingent upon the benefits package.”

The HR Manager stated, “Well, what would you say to a package of $200,000 annually, 5 weeks get-away, two weeks paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to half of the pay, and a company luxurious car leased every 2-years – say, a red Mercedes?”

The engineer sat up straight and stated, “wow!!! Are you really kidding?”

3. Different Points of View

A Mathematician, an engineer, and a physicist were happily travelling through Scotland when they saw a black sheep out of the train window.

“Aha”, articulates the architect, “I observe that Scottish sheep are originally black.”
“Well”, utters the physicist, “You imply that some Scottish sheep are black”.

“No”, flatly declares the mathematician, “All we come to know is that there is no less than one sheep in Scotland and at least one side of that one sheep is black!”

4. Factor of Safety

Prior to studying engineering, if somebody asked me what 1+1 is, I would have replied “2.”
Presently, I’d state “I’m almost certain it’s 2, but we would be advised to make it 3 just to be secured.” This is one of the funny engineering jokes.

5. Timid Engineers

What’s the distinction between an introverted and an extroverted engineer?

An introverted engineer sees his shoes when he’s conversing with you; an extroverted engineer takes a gander at your shoes when he’s conversing with you. This is really one of the engineering jokes short.

6. TCP Protocol

“Would I be able to disclose to you a TCP Joke?”
“Definitely, please tell me a TCP Joke.”
“Alright, I’ll tell you a TCP Joke.”

7. All Mixed up

Two mixing chambers are said to work in a factory, one says to the next “You are so proficient! How would you do it?” The other mixer is attentive to him and says “I don’t have the foggiest idea, I’m perplexed.”

8. One of these things isn’t like the other

A frozen pizza, a bachelor degree in engineering, and a doctorate in theoretical mathematics.

A frozen pizza and an engineer can both easily feed a family of 4. This joke is popular one in engineer’s jokes on-line.

9. A Tricky Storage Problem

What number of nuclear engineers does it take to change a light?
Seven: One to install the new bulb and six to make sense of how to manage the former one for the following 10,000 years.

10. The Polish Airline

For what reason does the Polish airline have such unusual seating plans in their airship?
Everybody realizes that poles in the right half plane are temperamental.

11. The Optimist, the Pessimist, and the Engineer

The optimistic thinker states: “The glass is half full.”

The pessimist utters: “The glass is half vacant.”

The engineer abruptly says: “The glass is twice as large as it should be.”

12. Mechanical Versus Civil Engineer

What’s the contrast between Mechanical Engineers and Civil Engineers?
Mechanical Engineers manufacture weapons; Civil Engineers make targets.

13. A Uniform Beam Strolls into a Bar…

A uniform pillar strolls into a bar. The barman asks, “What would you like to have, good sir?”

The beam answers “Ummm… simply give me a minute.” This can really be counted in the best engineering jokes.

14. Mathematics

Customer: “How would you gauge to what extent a task will take?”

Engineer: “I include the time required for every task, then multiply by pi.”

Customer: “Why multiply by pi?”

Engineer: “It clarifies why my evaluations are constantly ridiculous.”

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